Responding to the world as an autistic person
Updated: Mar 1
I used to respond very poorly to important stuff.
If someone took issue with something I said or did,
If something happened that took me by surprise,
I’d respond badly.
I would not know how to feel, not be able to think; to process or work through the experience.
I’d force a ready response.
And because it was forced, propelled by pressure and anxiety,
It would not be a fair representation of who I am, or how I think or feel about the world.
Many people believe autistic people are over reactors, over responders, that we can’t let something be.
I feel so deeply and my processing never stops.
I ruminate on events for weeks, months, years.
When I force a response, it will be over the top.
When I force a response, I will respond in a way that is not thought through.
When I force a response, I will continue an ongoing, open dialogue and add to it as I unravel and process because I didn’t have the space to in the first place.
These days, when I can’t make sense or pinpoint my emotional or cognitive or physical or energetic response to a situation, I let it be.
I let it unravel in its own time.
When I am forced, when I feel pressured, I shut down.
I need time.
I need processing time.
My thoughts, my feelings, my response to the world is huge.
It needs time.
When an autistic person does not respond immediately, or not in a way you’d expect, it may be that they need time.
We think differently.
Patience, time and space will allow you to get to the heart of who we truly are. . . Kristy Forbes inTune Pathways . . Image: Broken isn’t bad.